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Couples Counseling
In Tempe, AZ

Tempe Couples Therapy

Cultivating fulfilling relationships is an integral part of our work at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling. Couples Counseling includes any form of relationship counseling, including marriage counseling, premarital counseling, and counseling for partners who are dating or living together.

Our psychologists and counselors often apply Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) techniques in working with couples.

EFT method has been found to be effective in helping over 75% of couples in distress, recover and grow even after counseling has ended.

Every counselor at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling brings a holistic understanding of gender identity and sexual orientation to his or her practice, and all of our counseling services are applicable for LGBT relationships and communities.

We’re here for you.

Our counselors apply professional expertise and understanding to provide the best holistic counseling services in Tempe, AZ. A 10-min consultation can help you determine whether our services would be the right fit for you.

Call us today for a free phone consultation.

Biltmore lobby chairs

We’re here for you.

Our counselors apply professional expertise and understanding to provide the best holistic counseling services in Tempe, AZ. A 10-min consultation can help you determine whether our services would be the right fit for you.

Call us today for a free phone consultation.

Topics for Couples Counseling include:

Conflict Resolution

If you and your partner are experiencing recurring conflicts or struggling to resolve issues on your own, couples counseling can provide valuable support and guidance. All couples experience conflict, but conflict that is unresolved in a healthy manner will lead to hurt, neglect, distance or resentment.

Therapists at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling will work with you as a couple to develop effective communication skills, explore underlying issues, and work towards resolving conflicts in a healthier and more satisfying way.

Conflict Resolution in couples counseling is not about taking slides but rather strengthening the foundation of the relationship to assist the couple in resolving areas of conflict in a healthy manner.

Couples can expect BPC therapists to be create a safe and judgment environment where couples can work on skills and tools that will help in overcoming unresolved conflict that is negatively impacting the connection that you both desire.

Premarital Counseling

Premarital counseling is an important step in building a strong foundation for your future marriage and is an investment into your relationship that can provide returns for a lifetime.

Many couples who are progressing towards marriage benefit greatly from learning skills and preemptively discussing common relationship distress points prior to them becoming an issue for your marriage.

Biltmore Psychology and Counseling’s counselors and therapists will guide couples through topics such as expectations for the marriage, navigating family of origin dynamics, aligning on financial goals and roles in the relationship, sexual expectations and concerns, and more common points of concern for new married couples.

By taking the step to engage in premarital counseling studies show that both men and women have significantly increased marital satisfaction compared to couples that do not participate in premarital counseling.

Infidelity & Affairs

Infidelity is experienced by many couples, and if it happens to you, you may begin to feel helpless in your relationship. Whether you are the one who has cheated or the one cheated on, you both can experience pain, loneliness, and upset. But don’t give up hope – healing is possible.

Although it takes hard work, there are several ways that a couple can restore and rebuild a happy, healthy relationship after unfaithfulness occurs. BPC counselors will work with couples through the process of healing and rebuilding trust.

Couples can expect to discuss topics such as emotional pain, the role of shame in infidelity, appropriate boundaries, and underlying causes.

You do not have to give up on your relationship if cheating has occurred counseling coupled with a commitment work for a healthy relationship can result in a stronger relationship than before any infidelity took place.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) is one of the primary evidence-based therapy approaches used at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling that focuses on emotions and their role in human functioning and well-being.

Developed by Dr. Leslie Greenberg and Dr. Sue Johnson, EFT is primarily used in the context of individual therapy and couples therapy. Ninety percent (90%) of couples who go through EFT significantly improve their relationship and 70-75% of couples no longer fit criteria for relationship distress following treatment. Compared to a 35% success rate for the next leading couples therapy.

Since many couples aren’t aware of the primary emotions that are driving their secondary emotions and responses, BPC counselors work to identify, investigate, and experience these feelings and the messages they convey.

Often the secret to developing a stronger emotional bond is to identify emotions and risk sharing them with your partner. This vulnerability naturally pulls for compassion from your partner and is the foundation for intimacy.

This is the core element of EFT and what BPC counselors will work with you as a couple to achieve.

Perinatal Counseling

Perinatal Counseling
New parents enter a torrent of new information and experiences. expectations, and emotions. Accompanying these large changes are also significant physical changes for expectant and new mothers. All of this change and what may feel like the cruelest of mother nature’s actions is the lack of a proper instruction manual.

 

Biltmore Psychology & Counseling is here to help through our Perinatal Counseling service which is focused on supporting women and couples through their journey into parenthood. If you are experiencing any of the below, please know this is perfectly normal, and perinatal counseling can help.

  • Feelings of Guilt, Anxiety, Regret, Despair, Sadness, or Hopelessness
  • Feeling Like a “Bad Mother” or Not “Good Enough”
  • Strained Romantic or Family Relationships
  • Angry Outbursts, Increased Irritability, and Loss of Joy
  • Not Feeling Like a Person or Out of Body Experience
  • Fear of Being Alone with Your Baby
  • Grief related to infertility or perinatal loss

LGBTQ+ Counseling

LGBTQ+ Icon We believe that LGBTQ+ relationships are worth fighting for and should be given every professional resource and the best expert care. Although most of the principles guiding couples therapy in general apply to couples therapy with LGBTQ+ partners we recognize that there are key differences. Because of the way society has historically treated the LGBTQ+ community, same-sex partners may face the challenges of dealing with stages of acceptance around their gender identity, discrimination, and worries of concealing relationships. Counselors and Psychologists at BPC work to create a safe and affirming environment that will help a couple to achieve the emotional intimacy they so deeply desire.

Repairing Communication Difficulties

Communication difficulties in a romantic relationship are one of the most common reasons that couples seek couples counseling. The inability for a partner to be heard, misunderstanding of what was intended to be communicated and triggering non-verbal communication can lead to gridlock in a relationship. The good news is that psychology as a field, has undergone effort to research and understand what makes successful communication in a couple. Therapists at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling will not only work with couples to help resolve current communication skills, but will also work to build skills in the area of listening, communicating empathy, regulating defensive responses, how to apologize, communicating forgiveness, and more.

Closing the Gap on Emotional Distance

Emotional distance can creep into a relationship and maybe you find yourself saying or feeling like “we are growing apart” or “we are such different people than were used to be.” The intimacy that was once so alive in your relationship can fizzle overtime if not actively cared for and nurtured. This gap in emotional closeness can result in feelings of hurt, anger, resentment or apathy. Emotional distance is not fixed and does not have to be long lasting in a relationship. With help, couples can address the underlying causes of the emotional distance and begin the process of reconnection.

Conflict Resolution

Conflict resolution is important for couples when they come to a standstill regarding a divisive issue. For example, couples may have great difficulty figuring out how to discuss having children, how to discipline children, religion, finances, or managing in-law relationships. Though couples may communicate well in other ways, it is not uncommon for them to experience frustration when facing an impasse in a certain area of conflict. These conflicts can be either acute or chronic and can have significant impact on strength and intimacy of a relationship. Additionally, conflicts that are left unresolved can have a negative impact on other members of the family, co-workers, friends or other people close to the situation.

At Biltmore Psychology & Counseling, our psychologists work with couples to help them better communicate through these difficult topics and find resolve for long-standing arguments and places of marital tension.

The rings have been purchased, the big question has been asked, and wedding plans are well on their way. You may be asking yourself, “what steps can I take to help my marriage get off on the right foot”. Prior to their marriage, many couples wish to engage in premarital counseling as a way to better understand their future spouse, avoid common marital pitfalls, and learn how to communicate in ways that are effective. Premarital counseling is an important step in building a strong foundation for your future marriage, and is a place to develop skills that will last a lifetime. Areas commonly addressed in premarital counseling include: marriage expectations cohabitation issues • marital satisfaction ideals • personality issues/differences • communication • conflict resolution • financial management • leisure activities/interests • sexual expectations/preferences • children and parenting • family and friends • gender roles/expectations • spiritual beliefs • life transitions • health issues.

Healing from an Affair and Cheating

One of the most painful incidents a relationship can endure is the presence of an affair. Often when an affair is revealed, partners may wonder if the relationship could possibly survive and how they could ever recover. Feelings of anger, betrayal, shame and sadness can often cloud a couple’s ability to see a future for their relationship.

Though affairs are painful, our counselors at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling have helped many couples work through the difficult aspects of an affair and have led them to a place where they are more healthy and whole than when they started. Through hard work and commitment to the process, couples can and often do find a more enriching relationship dynamic than what existed prior to the affair.

In our discussions, we will create a safe environment of healing and reassurance to help the relationship return to a place where that is secure for both partners. Communication skills and individual needs will also be addressed to help better understand what precipitated the affair and how to prevent it from happening again in the future. Our counselors will work with the couple to lay down a foundation in which trust can be reestablished, forgiveness can be given and love can flourish.

Helping relationships thrive is at the core of the work we do here at BPC. We are committed to helping you through this situation to a  healthier and more fulfilling time in your journey.

Perinatal CounselingNew parents enter a torrent of new information and experiences. expectations, and emotions. Accompanying these large changes are also significant physical changes for expectant and new mothers. All of this change and what may feel like the cruelest of mother nature’s actions is the lack of a proper instruction manual.

BPC is here to help through our Perinatal Counseling service which is focused on supporting women and couples through their journey into parenthood. If you are experiencing any of the below, please know this is perfectly normal, and perinatal counseling can help.

• Feelings of Guilt or Regret
• Excessive Worry, Fear and Anxiety
• Feeling Like a “Bad Mother” or Not “Good Enough”
• Strained Romantic or Family Relationships
• Feelings of Despair, Sadness, or Hopelessness
• Angry Outbursts, Increased • Irritability, Loss of Joy
• Not Feeling Like a Person or • Out of Body Experience
• Fear of Being Alone with Your Baby
• Grief Related to Infertility or Perinatal Loss

LGBTQ+ Counseling

LGBTWe are here to change the way people view couples counseling. Couples counseling is not for the “broken,” it is for the motivated couples looking to live a better life. We are all imperfect. We all have flaws. We have all made mistakes. Our clients are tenacious individuals who refuse to give up easily and desire a relationship that is better than the rest.

At BPC we believe that everyone should feel accepted, affirmed, and embraced for who they are. Therefore, we set out to create a place where couples within the LGBTQ+ community can feel safe to explore, heal, and grow their relationship. Cultivating fulfilling relationships is an integral part of our work at Biltmore Psychology and Counseling and our services include LGBTQ+ marriage counseling, pre-marital counseling, and counseling for partners who are dating or living together. Our counselors are fully aware of the many common and unique challenges that LGBTQ+ couples face in their relationships and within the community and sensitively create a safe place to discuss these in counseling. We are passionate about LGBTQ+ rights and acceptance, and affirmation of your relationship is built into everything that we do.

Our psychologists and counselors often apply Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) techniques in working with couples. EFT method has been found to be effective in helping over 75% of couples in distress recover and grow even after counseling has ended. In a supportive environment, we help LGBTQ+ couples mend their relationship and assist them with finding tools to connect and love.

Repairing Communication Difficulties

Communication difficulties are a common reason many individuals seek out Marriage Counseling or Couples Counseling. Though many of us may be very eloquent and articulate in our relationships with colleagues and friends, it is not uncommon to find that we struggle to communicate well with our spouse or partner. So often this relationship, laden with deeper needs and expectations, can leave us pulling our hair out as we try to get our partner to understand what we need and how we feel. Marriage Counseling or Couples Counseling is a valuable asset for helping individuals overcome these common communication difficulties. Although communication difficulties in your relationship can be very frustrating and painful, there is hope. In counseling, we will discuss the common patterns that lead to arguments, help partners express their needs in a way that the other partner can hear and understand, and help partners develop skills to overcome communication difficulties that have plagued them in the past.

Closing the Gap on Emotional Distance

Emotional distance can develop from months or years of unresolved conflict and life stressors in your relationship. As time passes and circumstances change, it is not uncommon for couples to express dissatisfaction with the level of emotional connection that they feel with their partner. Some couples even share that they feel like they are living separate lives from their partner and that their partner has become more like a roommate than a spouse or a friend. When experiencing emotional distance in your relationship, it is not uncommon for the relationship to dive into a cycle of push and pull (Pursue and Withdrawal). This cycle can make you feel like the person who once showed you that they loved you most is not even on your team anymore. In couples counseling, we look at identifying the early signs of this cycle and helping you to learn to avoid it so that you can share the emotional intimacy that you desire. At Biltmore Psychology & Counseling, our Psychologists help couples rekindle the emotional closeness and passion that was once found in their relationship, helping them return to satisfying levels of companionship, friendship, and intimacy.

Relationship Counseling for Dating Couples

For many couples, increasing conflict and distress does not start when they are married, but begins while they are dating. When in the midst of dating distress, many couples fear that the early presence of conflict is a “sign” that the relationship may not be sustainable.

However, at Biltmore Psychology & Counseling, our Psychologists have worked with many dating couples and have found that pursuing counseling during this time does not indicate that the relationship is doomed to fail. In fact, many couples that choose to begin couples counseling while dating find that it actually sets them up for the success they are hoping for.

Dating distress does not mean that your relationship is bad or not the “right fit”. Good relationships are often hard work, and within our practice we help couples develop the skills they need to overcome hardship, and create a healthy, fulfilling connection. We have discovered that couples who are committed to the relationship and loving one another can flourish and benefit greatly from counseling when the experience dating distress.

Infertility Counseling

Perinatal CounselingStress, anxiety, depression, guilt, and anger are all common when experiencing infertility. These feelings can put a strain on any relationship and make it difficult to love yourself and your partner.

Having an infertility counselor during this time can be beneficial in helping each person be able to communicate what the process has been like for them. Since it is common for couples to experience the frustrations of infertility differently, a counselor can give tools for better communication and help explain what has led each partner to experience what they are experiencing.

Biltmore Psychology and Counseling provides counseling for individuals and couples managing the emotional stresses associated with infertility. We encourage couples to seek counseling early on in their struggles. This way expectations and disappointments can be dealt with together with the help of a professional psychologist.

Creating, establishing, and repairing emotionally fulfilling relationships is an integral part of our mission. If you are struggling with the emotional stress of infertility, please call us at (480) 999-7070

Additional Topics We Help With Include:

Social Media & Online Relationships | Sexuality | Separation | Negative Relationship Patterns | Divorce

Couples Counseling FAQ

For the first session, the couple usually meets with their therapist together to discuss the history of their distress, unsuccessful attempts to heal, and the goals for therapy. The therapist will provide feedback on the strengths that he or she sees in the couple and will propose a treatment plan.
In the following sessions, the therapist will likely meet with each person individually to gather a more in-depth personal history. Couples counselors will usually state there are no secrets in couples counseling. Any information shared in an individual session cannot be kept secret from the other partner.

At the end of counseling, couples hope to have healed emotional injuries to the relationship, clarified their desire to be together, or have decided to enter a separation process with the highest level of care and compassion.

Most importantly, the counselor’s role is not to decide if the couple should stay together but is to help the couple achieve the highest level of healing possible. So, they can determine if they would like to stay together or separate.

Read More: What to Expect at Your First Couples Counseling Session

Depending on the couple’s goals, most couples counseling sessions will focus on the history of distress and attempt to help the couple find a greater resolution. As specific incidences of distress are discussed, a couples counselor may be watching for themes of disconnection and assist the couple in overcoming the barriers that have been getting in the way.
A counselor may also attempt to help the couple intellectually understand their partner as well as emotionally connecting to the places of distress. Couples may focus on improving communication and restoring levels of connection that were once present in the past.
Other couples may focus on healing attachment injuries that have occurred due to an affair. Some may focus on specific difficulties such as step-parenting or frustrations with in-laws. Another couple may present for pre-marital counseling as a preemptive attempt to avoid common relationship pitfalls.

By definition, short-term counseling is considered to be 12 sessions so most couple counseling lasts between 12-24 sessions. However, many couples wait until they are on the brink of divorce or separation before they start therapy.
Factors that predict success and length of session:
Timing – How recently was the affair, lie, or injury to the relationship. Since time does not heal all wounds but instead causes them to fester, the greater the length of time between the incident and counseling, the greater the recovery. Researcher, John Gottman, Ph.D., found that couples are usually unhappy for six years before they receive help.
Motivation – Highly motivated couples are usually able to overcome even the most difficult of circumstances and may be able to do so in substantially fewer sessions.
Fit – Finding a therapist that the couple connects with and feels understood by is key to a more brief and efficient therapy.

No. Couples of any marital status (dating, courting, engaged, married) can participate in couples counseling. The couple does not have to be dating or married for a prescribed length of time to benefit from counseling. In fact, the sooner the couple addresses any underlying distress, the greater the chances of positive outcomes.

Yes. For various reasons, an individual may choose to come in by themselves for concerns related to their relationship. When appropriate, someone may start counseling by themselves, then later bring their partner in for couples counseling, if desired. Others may choose to have two counselors, one for individual therapy and another for couples counseling.

Most therapists will see each person individually for one session to gather a more in-depth personal history. Beyond this initial individual session, the future individual session will depend on the goals outlined. It is important to note that there are no secrets in couples counseling, meaning that information shared individually cannot remain confidential from the other partner.

We prefer that couples arrange for childcare and avoid bringing their child in for couples counseling. Due to the sensitive and emotional nature of this work, couples that bring their children often are not able to engage in conversations in the most honest, undistracted way.

The research on couples counseling is very exciting for counselors using Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT). The most recent studies have shown that 70-75% of couples fully recover from their distress and that 90% show significant improvements. The best news, is that these improvements don’t just last while in therapy, but the effect lasts after the treatment has ended.

Our office is out-of-network, so we do not accept insurance directly. However, if your insurance plan offers out-of-network benefits, we can provide you with a receipt so that you can bill your insurance directly.
Depending on the individual insurance plan, many will be reimbursed for a percentage of their payment. To determine if you have out-of-network mental health coverage, contact your insurance and ask about whether your plan includes out-of-network mental health coverage. Feel free to contact our office with any questions.

Each couple has their own specific reason for coming to couple’s therapy. So, the price for couples counseling sessions varies, depending on the couple’s needs. If you have questions about pricing, please contact our offices for pricing: 480-999-7070.

Meet Our Team

Dr Melissa Estavillo

Dr Melissa Estavillo

Psy.D. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.A. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology B.S. Psychology, Grand Canyon University

Audret Sessions

Dr Audrey Sessions

Psy.D. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.A. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.S. Mental Health Counseling, Walden University

Dr Linda DeBiase photo.

Dr. Linda DeBiase

Forest Institute of Professional Psychology, Doctorate in Clinical Psychology Lake Forest College, B.A. Psychology California School of Professional Psychology, Clinical Psychology

Nicole Elliott, LPC

M.C. Counseling, Arizona State University B.A. English (Literature), Arizona State University

Elizabeth Felix, LPC

M.A. Professional Counseling, Ottawa University M.A. Human Resources and Substance Abuse, Ottawa University B.A. Psychology, Ottawa University

Heather Wheeler, LCSW

Masters in Social Work, Arizona State University B.A. Psychology, Arizona State University

Laura Reed, LPC

M.S. Professional Counseling, Grand Canyon University B.S. Psychology, Grand Canyon University

Join our Team
Dr Melissa Estavillo

Dr Melissa Estavillo

Psy.D. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.A. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology B.S. Psychology, Grand Canyon University

Audret Sessions

Dr Audrey Sessions

Psy.D. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.A. Clinical Psychology, Arizona School of Professional Psychology M.S. Mental Health Counseling, Walden University<

Dr Linda DeBiase photo.

Dr Linda DeBiase

Forest Institute of Professional Psychology, Doctorate in Clinical Psychology Lake Forest College, B.A. Psychology California School of Professional Psychology, Clinical Psychology

Nicole Elliott, LPC

M.C. Counseling, Arizona State University B.A. English (Literature), Arizona State University

Elizabeth Felix, LPC

M.A. Professional Counseling, Ottawa University M.A. Human Resources and Substance Abuse, Ottawa University B.A. Psychology, Ottawa University<

Heather Wheeler, LCSW

Masters in Social Work, Arizona State University B.A. Psychology, Arizona State University

Laura Reed, LPC

M.S. Professional Counseling, Grand Canyon University B.S. Psychology, Grand Canyon University

Our Location Near Tempe, AZ