The Differences in Grieving After a Miscarriage Between Couples

Woman crying into a tissue while a man comforts her.

Experiencing grief after a miscarriage can be extremely stressful, sad, and exhausting. And often couples come to find that they are both experiencing different thoughts, emotions, and feelings.

Women might feel an intense amount of grief due to losing the bond of carrying a child, and going through the physical pain of a miscarriage. Sometimes a man or a partner can feel a sense of loss for not getting the chance to begin or develop a bond with the child.

The most important thing in sharing this unbearable grief, is realizing that both parties will be going through something different individually. Understanding and supporting each other’s individual experiences in grief, will help maintain the relationship in the short and the long run.

We think that open and honest communication after a miscarriage is the best first step at healing. And then of course, seeking outside help in ways to cope with the grief both separately and together can have a big impact on the long term relationship.

There is a great article on Romper, that talks about ‘9 Ways to Help Your Relationship After a Miscarriage’. The author Sarah Hosseini starts with;

1. Encourage Each Other To ‘Lean Into’ The Grief

2. Favor Emotional Transparency Over Silence

3. Don’t Compare Each Other’s Grief

4. Try Not To Blame One Another For The Loss

5. Exhibit Awareness And Compassion For The Person Who’s Body Had The Miscarriage

6. Don’t Turn Elsewhere For Support

7. Find Ways To Ritualize OR Memorialize The Loss Together

8. Commit To Healing Together

9. Accept That Sometimes Relationships Don’t Make It After Loss


Head on over to read more about these 9 ways to heal your relationship after such loss. And know that grieving comes in waves, and you and your partner may not be grieving in the same way. That is okay. But it doesn’t have to mean that your relationship needs to suffer.